The Story of Queen Mother

"Mae sudah penat lor", I received an sms from my brother at 8.53am, 10 Aug. I couldn't go back to sleep. I went to work, I was so restless I couldn't concentrate. I called up my sis, I sms my sis, I sms my cousin, I called my cousin, I called my sis, I sms my sis. I was so so restless, my sister and I decided that it was time to go home or it will be too late. Luckily my supervisor let my off early. Took the monorail back to my place, took some stuff and ran to the monorail to go to Titiwangsa. Took taxi to Hentian Duta. Sis was already there waiting for me. We boarded a 5.30pm bus. The journey was hell. The bus was driven very very slow, I swore a lot, I cried a lot, I laughed a little, I smile sometimes, but the journey was the longest one I'd ever took. Half-way through the way north, bro called asking where we were for the zillionth times. Smelled something fishy, sis said it didn't sound so good, "Are we too late?", she asked. I was preparing for the worst, my eyes wet again. I sat restlessly on the bus. Will I get to see her for the last time? Then we arrived. Finally. Reaching Alor Star, we had to drive for another 45 minutes to reach grandma's house. I was in the car driven by bro, while sis was with cousin driving. It was dead silent between bro and I. I didn't dare to ask the question. How is maemae? What if I don't like the answer? So, I didn't ask. Reached grandma's house. I quickly got out of the car, rushed inside the house. There she was. Breathing heavily. Everyone was there. Her three children, five grandchildren, few close relatives. I kissed her, asked her how she's doing. She just lying there with her eyes closed. Then, the we kissed her again. She smiled. She smiled. SMILE. I knew it was hard for her to smile. I knew she was using all her strength to smile, to tell us that she was fine. That was the sweetest smile I've ever seen. I will never forget it. I'll bring that smile to my grave. Then she opened her eyes. Her eyes looked around. She saw me, I was certain. I told her I love her. She was dying, she breathed heavily, she ... ... the situation was horrible. I felt so helpless. She looked at my sis, she looked around, she looked at everyone. She must be happy that everyone was there, all her love ones were there. By her side. She struggled for a while. She opened her eyes. Looked at my mom, the daughter she cared and worried the most and I certain the one she loved the most. Her eyes telling mom goodbye and expressing her last mother love. Then she was gone. Her last breath was at 3.44am, 11 August 2009. I watched her go. I watched her leave. My maemae, my grandma. I love you. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

R.I.P my lovely maemae 1928 - 2009 "เวลาอาจทำให้เราต้องจากกัน แต่สักวันเราคงได้พบกันอีก หลับให้สบายนะ maemae สุดที่รัก" see you later นะ